For laughs…In the words of …

For laughs…In the words of …

Festus 

Nebila:“It takes a real man to admit his faults..”
Festus:“Well, if that’s what it means to be a man, I’m not interested!”

The problem with women these days, they don’t know what they want. And the ones that do, well we don’t want them

You’re never wrong, only incorrect sometimes

May the goodness of GOD run you over, blessings overwhelm you, and favor be your currency

Nairobi is small, but a little big

She is like a nanny but there are no children

There’s a saying in Kiswahili that goes something like, “You only have one tooth, why do you need to brush?” Even if you have one tooth, though, you still need to brush!

With friends like Nebila, who needs enemies?

You should be here in the car when no one is…this is where I shut up, for fear of being misquoted.
Nebila: Or is it for fear of being quoted?

Well, you’re not supposed to have it if you haven’t ordered for it…
-Speaking of finding worms in food, after some reflection and insistence that worms are healthy

Are you saying I should buy you pockets?
-Responding to my argument that unlike him, I don’t carry my phone around in my pocket, and thus can’t be expected to pick up all the time.

Stop pouring cold water on my stories

Trish

I don’t give a single quarter of a hoot!

Chely 

Common sense is not so common

Glenda

Do you want gunshot?
-meaning to ask Nebila if she wanted shotgun

Agi

She didn’t even call to bother

Pieces & bits

I love how the light has to try to get on
-In Zanzibar as the fluorescent lights flicker…

I can’t wear their shoes-they don’t fit! We don’t have the same style…! -In reference to people who ask others to empathize with Israel as it bombards Gaza

“We have no money?!” We can’t do that to our brothers and sisters in Africa-they’ve heard it enough!
-In ref to the applicants on the continent for our AAA conference

Gum? I don’t get it. Why chew something you can’t swallow?

Ada

I don’t trust muffins…I don’t understand them-they can’t decide, are they cake or are they bread?

Mami wata: it’s demonic and Glenda needs to remember that she is African!

When I go back to Lagos, Lagos won’t be big enough for the two of us!
-referring to her baby’s daddy

Cass

Agi: I think I’m going crazy (speaking about life)
Cass: “At least you’re going somewhere”

Let’s workshop this bad boy!

I need to consult my planet of loneliness
-in reference to Lonely Planet

Agi:“How are you going to buy it?” (asking her about a professional camera)
Cass: “With money!”

I’m going home to reevaluate!
-In Zanzibar, in regards to her plans later that day..

Michelle: How do you get your hands on these films (asking about obtaining African Films)
Cass: “I put my hand in my pocket first….!”

Nebila: “You’ve been to Madagascar?”
Cass: “I’ve been online”

My cell baby went to sleep
-Cass’ way of saying her battery died..!

Wala 

Y’all just wanna learn!!
-speaking of some of us taking on challenging courses…

Fungai

I don’t carry much money around with me, only enough to pay if I step on someone’s tomatoes

Ali

When I chew chat, I have the world in my pocket. In the past hour of chewing chat, I’ve already built two buildings in Nairobi.

Aneel 

I don’t think they’re real-I just believe in them!
-referring to his belief in aliens

Semiha 

It was tight!
-in response to questions about how the bunji jump was, but in reference not to the jump, but to the rope around her legs

All in A Day! (March 15, 2009) when we went to Merkato, LA for dinner…

Agi: “Ada, can you hear me?!” (Is on the phone with Ada, having a hard time communicating)
Ada: “First things first, are you AT&T?!”
Agi: “Yea, yea…”
Ada: “Ok, I can hear you now!”

Agi: “Nebu, that’s a spot for loading.” (We’re looking for a spot to park in lil Ethio..)
Nebu: “But it’s Sunday.”
Agi: “What does that mean?”
Nebu: “Well-who loads on a Sunday?”
Agi: “Who loads, she says!”
Ada: “Trust me, even though God rested on Sunday, the parking people don’t!”

Agi: “Ada, you got your eyes closed!” (Just took a picture of all of us)
Ada: “I was going for the dreamy look…”
Wala: “Instead, you went for the sleepy look!”

Ada: “Ah, who got the camera?”
The rest of us: “Agi!”
Ada: “No, no, no…Agi doesn’t have facebook…she needs to get with the program!!”

Miscellaneous

There’s too much month at the end of the money
-A common saying among people who are broke before the month ends

Don’t lose your temper…nobody needs it!

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2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Ibukun
    Aug 07, 2011 @ 20:57:00

    These made me laugh. I think I better start carrying just enough money to cover crushed tomatoes too. 🙂

    Reply

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